A Bucket of Fried Health Care

In the beginning, the elohim created skies and earth.

Welcome back. 

There are some things that happen in America that confound me.

Today, I met my first Affordable Health Care Act casualty: a mother, Mrs. Moore, whose son had committed a zero tolerance offense. 

Her son had been sent to us after his middle school learned that he had not done his zero tolerance time.  

Someone had dropped the ball--if I might employ a cliché.

That was not the worst of her sorrow.  Mrs. Moore told me that for the first time in her life she was homeless.  

Apparently, someone dropped the ball again, except this time, the ball was too big to fit inside a gymnasium or a nation, and when it dropped, the ground quaked.

Then she told me why she was homeless.  Popeyes had cut her hours from forty to twenty-seven so she could be legally designated a part time employee.

I knew then who the culprit was.  It was President Obama's fault.  Mrs. Moore did not say that.  I did.  

If he had left well enough alone so that our patriotic job creators, subsidized by tax breaks out the yin yang, might enjoy the blessings of liberty that their riches afford them from the labor of people who do all the working and dying in this country, then she might be housed with no health insurance instead of being homeless with it. 

However, I can't tell who the worst victim here is.  Is it this mother or Popeyes?  I mean, who do we feel sorry for the most?

I, for one, feel nothing but deep and abiding pity in my heart for poor poor Popeyes.  They may well be forced to run around like a fried chicken franchise with its roof chopped off once ObamaCare is fully implemented.  

We cannot expect Popeyes to allow their workers to lower them into the fiery fat of financial ruin. I love their chicken.  That’s the last thing I want to see unless it’s on my plate.

Popeyes believes in that old time religion healthcare which is the official healthcare plan of the Republican Party. 

You know the plan:  pray you don’t get sick.

Who can blame them?  Popeyes had no choice because there’s no Cajun or mild healthcare, only ObamaCare.    

That’s two fixin’s our government has served up to poor Popeyes.  Minimum wage is the other one.

How does a manager who may otherwise be a moral person tell a mother of two children that she must be a part time employee?

It’s easy.  Popeyes exists solely to make money, lots of it, and if their fat cats get even fatter by keeping that labor budget as low as inhumanely possible...well...then...that’s a good thing…like remembering to ask for the jelly before you sit down.  

First of all, that mother is an enemy of the state for wanting healthcare.  She violates the all American economic system of laissez faire which in French means “the gravy will trickle down to the taters if you leave it alone.” 

Like most liberals, that mother wants someone else, namely, the government, to dip out that gravy and pour it onto those taters. 

I say, thank God for laissez faire. It is as American an economic system as biscuits, unlike the president’s, which is a more European style economic system that is as European as croissants.

I do not know what benefit Popeyes receives from avoiding the AHCA law.  Is it an economic necessity, a corporate political protest, or a precursor to a new breakfast menu?

  

Let’s be honest here.  The bucket of health care we shared before Mr. Obama put his greasy fingers into it was perfect.  

It cured illness with a huge dose of despair given intravenously or as a suppository that comes in a pill the size of the plump part of a chicken leg. 

I’ve always been able to endure any virus when I concentrate on how many years it will take me to pay for the hospital stay, tests, and medicine.

I was not happy at first with ObamaCare because it was a conservative idea straight out of the pit of the Heritage Foundation.  The thing I don’t like about conservatives is that they do not tinker to make better, they tinker to make richer.

But seriously, folks, how is it that we have read the gospels for centuries without knowing that alleviating the grinding plight of poor people is a very Jesusy thing to do? 

I seem to recall a few times when Jesus healed the sick without having them sign a payback plan.  Usually, those who were sick were also very poor.

The system we have now is not that great for anyone, let alone working people.  If you are blessed with Captain Kirk health, if you rarely go to the doctor, then it works great for you.

However, if you are like most people, if you age, if you have gout, chronic back pain, Cohn’s Disease, Colitis, MS, HIV, diabetes, and the list goes on and on, and if you despair as the hospital bills hundred-dollar you to death or thousand-dollar you to debt, then you know the system, such as it is now, loves money more than men and women.

At least, if you focus on the despair it elevates your nausea to a higher level so you don’t think about having to vomit.

Surely, the least our God of love would require of us would be to devise a just economic system that is as fair and sound as our military complex is strong and fatal.

Blessings…